Duality

I believe that the worst thing in Japan is that you'll never find their feelings about yourself. So, you will never understand whether you are doing right or wrong. This is a result of the way they treat you. No matter what you do, they will respond positive.
You may say that this is not a big problem. However, as a foreigner, I have experienced many situations here and suffered from their duality. Once I broke a part of a device by mistake, I simply wrote a message to the one working with the same device. He came over and said that it is OK and no problem but after leaving, I saw him hitting the wall for this inconvenience saying some words. In another scene, they were talking about a friend of mine but pronouncing her name in an offensive way.
Two days ago, working in the lab, I asked a student if he is doing his research work. "Yes", he answered. Then he asked me the same. "I'm checking my emails", I said. You know, his reaction was this: "What a wonderful work. You are doing a very nice job"...

This, may not look a big problem in the first glance. But to us, this is annoying first of all as we know that this is not the real thing they think of, and secondly, we can not make any plan/schedule for future since their response can not be trusted.