Hard to say, but...

Yes. It is. Indeed it is hard to say goodbye. Even for a short time.
Here, everything is the same. The same as the night I arrived. It was three years ago and I had no idea about the new life. I mean the life here, in Japan. It was a strange feeling. Where am I going and for how long?

And now, I've to confess that it went fast. Faster than what I expected. In a blink...

I will take my stuff back. Back to Iran for another experience; this time, with another point of view. Among the things I got to carry, the lightest is my degree. The doctoral certificate. And the heaviest, is my memories. Memories of joyful times with my new friends. Wait! I said nothing is changed. But I think I was wrong. Everything is changed as I could make new friends here. Both Itanians and Japanese. Iranians, to tell the truth, brought me the best moments of my life here. Yes. the precious friends are here. And I've to leave them soon. This is not fair but no way...

This breeze comes with drops of my tears. Do not know why but it is just the feeling. Cooling the face and firing the heart...

And I happened to start my blog here in Japan. Like breeze in this stormy island. Tried to be myself. Tried to flow regardless of borders. You know, flowers are flowers, everywhere. And the sea; And the sky.

Now, I've you. As my dear friends; being with breeze every single day. The breeze will not stop and I'll give you my deepest regards through it. So every morning, open the windows and take a deep look at the leaves dancing with the breeze...
The BREEZE will start to flow but needs to take a rest at home...


And to close this post, just read story of the giving tree by Shel Silverstein:

##########
Once there was a giving tree who loved a little boy.
And everyday the boy would come to play
Swinging from the branches, sleeping in the shade
Laughing all the summer’s hours away.
And so they love,
Oh, the tree was happy.
Oh, the tree was glad.

But soon the boy grew older and one day he came and said,
"Can you give me some money, tree, to buy something I’ve found?"
"I have no money," said the tree, "Just apples, twigs and leaves."
"But you can take my apples, boy, and sell them in the town."
And so he did and
Oh, the tree was happy.
Oh, the tree was glad.

But soon again the boy came back and he said to the tree,"
I’m now a man and I must have a house that’s all my home."
"I can’t give you a house" he said, "The forest is my house."
"But you may cut my branches off and build yourself a home"
And so he did.
Oh, the tree was happy.
Oh, the tree was glad.

And time went by and the boy came back with sadness in his eyes.
"My life has turned so cold," he says, "and I need sunny days."
"I’ve nothing but my trunk," he says, "But you can cut it down
And build yourself a boat and sail away."
And so he did and
Oh, the tree was happy.
Oh, the tree was glad.

And after years the boy came back, both of them were old.
"I really cannot help you if you ask for another gift."
"I’m nothing but an old stump now. I’m sorry but I’ve nothing more to give"
"I do not need very much now, just a quiet place to rest,"
The boy, he whispered, with a weary smile.
"Well", said the tree, "An old stump is still good for that."
"Come, boy", he said, "Sit down, sit down and rest a while."
And so he did and
Oh, the trees was happy.
Oh, the tree was glad.
##########

So long my friends...
But I promise to come back again...

Art of teaching

"Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater."

- Gail Godwin

Que Sera Sera

Everybody is worried about his/her future for sure.
As a kid, there is a strange feeling with us. What will I be? What I want to be? How the world will treat me?
Yes. There are lots of questions to ask and many of us do not feel ourselves strong enough even to ask our parents about it. And if you ask them, all you get is a not-understandable reply. But it gives the sense. A sense of happiness with an un-known background. Perhaps they mean: Just wait, you'll see by yourself. You'll get it one day. And they are right, we got to wait, to face everything which comes.

But, alas, we cant't have everything. I mean all joys are not coming to you at the same time. You feel it when you look at your parents getting older and older which fades their smiles day by day. Now you understand. You get what they wanted to tell you...

"Que Sera Sera" was written for Alfred Hitchcock's 1956 re-make Of his 1934 film "The Man Who Knew Too Much" Starring Doris Day & Jimmy Stewart. Lyrics tell everything itself...

##########
When I was just a little girl
I asked my mother
What will I be
Will I be pretty
Will I be rich
Here's what she said to me

Que sera, sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours to see
Que sera, sera
What will be, will be

When I grew up and fell in love
I asked my sweetheart
What lies ahead
Will we have rainbows
Day after day
Here's what my sweetheart said

Que sera, sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours to see
Que sera, sera
What will be, will be

Now I have Children of my own
They ask their mother
What will I be
Will I be handsome
Will I be rich
I tell them tenderly

Que sera, sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future's not ours to see
Que sera, sera
What will be, will be
Que Sera, Sera
##########

A short week

Monday and Friday were holidays this week. So I had 3 working days and lots of things to do. Therefore, I decided to come to the lab the whole week.

I started with some new experiments which finally led us to the conclusion that the device with its current configuration does not work well because of conflicts between physics and chemistry.

So today -Friday- I'm working on another sample and hope that this one works for the sake of god.

I also spent some time with our Iranian Friends in Fukuoka Film Festival screening four Iranian movies this time. And I had a great time with Mr. M. Majidi, Mr. P. Parastui, Mr. R. Mirkarimi, Mr. M. Raigan, Ms. F. Motamed Arya,... through discussions here in our small group.

Finally, I got to postpone my trip to Iran because of some problems. So I may stay for 3 more weeks or so...

The Willow Tree

I spent yesterday afternoon with Majid Majidi, Parviz Parastouei, ... in Fukuoka film festival. Majidi's "The Willow Tree" was great. A story based on a true story where a blind professor gets his sight back after having an operation. This, though seems to be a great point in professor's life, turns to be the begining of a big challenge. After 38 years of blindness, he finds himself in a mirror, a real stranger...

And the new status brings all difficulties. He gets lost in himself; confused with the environment. He is simply seduced by the colorful life; by the things he gets with his eyes; unaware of the games. You know he gets into a dangerous trade, forgetting those beauties he got by the heart for 38 years for the sake of some fascinating scenes captured in blinks.

Then, the man used to love his wife and kid, falls in love with his student who looks quite pretty (and younger than his wife). No way, the life is ruined. Everything is gone, family, love,...

This, could be the story of all of us as we loose the heartful things in our complex daily life. Real joys are not those you see with your eyes. You just got to close your eyes and listen to your heart. Then, you'll see that there are lots of things to feel and enjoy while your eyes do not have the chance to get them all and ignore them all...

Yes. It happened!

You know, I wanted to stay away of my blog yesterday. So I put those numbers there in order to get your response though seems that my dear friend, Saeid, came and ...

First of all, thanks to all of you my blog readers for your nice greetings and birthday messages. Saeid, me, Farzad, Sakura, Maryam,... Many thanks to all of you. You made my day a bright and happy one. Thanks and thanks...

And why did I wrote those digits? Well, I wanted to remind myself to write a post about Japan to those who are not familiar with Japanese calendar.

Actually, Japanese calendar is based on the year each emperor starts his work. For instance, we are in HEISEI 17 now. It means that current emperor has started 17 years ago. And I was born when previous emperor- named SHOWA- was on the job.

You know, it looked a little bit funny when I saw my birthday on my ID-card here. It was SHOWA 48. Then I laughed and said: Well, seems that I'm older than what I believed so far, 4 years if you take it as an Iranian year and 25 years for gregorian calendar...

73

32

To Farzad

Got freezed after reading Farzad's story. It has occupied my mind and I've lost my concentration since yesterday.

Written with my tears,
Sent via the breeze,
Letter of my heart,
To dear Farzad.

No joy today,
No word to say,
No light to see,
No help to be.

I feel the pain,
Where is the rain?
To wash the tears,
To fade the sears.

The sky is gray,
How can I just pray?
But the god is above,
And the soul is alive...

Yes. Friends are around,
Let the heart get the sound,
And Ali will remain,
On the mind of the sane...

So far, So close

I watched "So far, So close" last night. The story was about a doctor lost in a world. A world of himself with all its complexities which push him away from his own family and society around him.

"Your doughter is like someone stuck in a well in a desert. No way. How can I help her for a few more days? She will die. Everybody dies." says the doctor (carelessly) to the mother of a patient in an early scene of the movie.

And the ending scene of the movie: The doctor is stock in his car covered by a pile of sand-due to the storm- in the middle of a desert...

Vacancy

If there is enough support available, would you take a job to operate a library in a poor area (with poor children) of a small town in Iran as your permanent job?

White flag

Released in september 2oo3, Dido's "white flag" ranked as one of the best singles and as far as I remember, it was selected as the best song in England (2003).

The song gives the feelings of someone deeply in love. You know, many people may be in the same situation; Left alone because of their own faults and mistakes but still hopeful to touch a heart. Yes. Indeed many have been in the same situation but the words...

It is difficult to express our feelings through putting some words together. To say that we are sorry and to say what we really want to say...

##########
I know you think that I shouldn't still love you or tell you that.
But if I didn't say it well I'd still have felt it,
where's the sense in that
I promise I'm not trying to make your life harder
Or return to where we were but

I will go down with this ship and I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door,
I'm in love and always will be

I know I left too much mess and destruction to come back again
And I caused but nothing but trouble,
I understand if you can't talk to me again
And if you live by the rules of "it's over" then I'm sure that that makes sense but

I will go down with this ship and I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door,
I'm in love and always will be

And when we meet, which I'm sure we will
All that was there, will be there still
I'll let it pass, and hold my tongue
And you will think, that I've moved on....

I will go down with this ship and I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door,
I'm in love and always will be

I will go down with this ship and I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door,
I'm in love and always will be

I will go down with this ship and I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door,
I'm in love and always will be
##########

Another report

Well. I don't know why I'm posting my weekly reports when there is nothing important to write about.
Anyhow, better to say something.
It was (and is) an stressful week. I had to contact many people to organize my trip. However, the problem is that still I'm not sure about my plan. When to go? Where to go!!!
Nevertheless, I packed my luggage in three boxes to be sent to Iran via post. Other stuff are to be carried via my flight. Some in cargo, some onboard. I still have time to decide but I think I'll postpone my trip coz there are many things to do.
And the gold crucible-which made a delay of about 2months in my research by the way- will arrive today. And I got to start a new sets of experiments.
I'm also writing a report on my works here as a new student is coming to continue the way.

OK. That's all. And Btw, the new post will come later (maybe in about 5 hours).

My last leaf

There is a temple here in Fukuoka which is located very close to Dazaifu shrine. Dazaifu shrine has its own story and I may write about it some day.

Today, however, I'd like to write a short post about the small temple mentioned above.

The temple has the same structure as the other Japanese temples. The major difference, however, is its very nice nature with trees turning to orange, red, yellow (the leaves of course) in the interface of autumn and winter. And the special thing about this temple is a room which I call it "My beautiful life".

Yes. "My beautiful life". The room has its side open to the nice and dazzling scenery with old people sitting there calm in darkness. No sound. Stared at the leaves falling down from the trees, they write their memories down. With tears in eyes...
Each leaf could be a day in their life. And perhaps, they are reading them and revitalizing their sweet memories.

And there is always, a fear of the last leaf to be down...

Appologies

These days I'm too busy with my stuff which are to be sent to Iran.
Therefore, I've got a few minutes to work on my blog. And I'm so sorry if I can't reply your nice comments regularly. But please be sure that I read all of them and enjoy your thoughts and messages.

Next post will come in about an hour...

A simple question

Several years ago-when I was a student, our teacher asked a simple question:

"Why people are not scared of each other when they are alive but they do fear when they see dead bodies?" And continued: "You see, dead bodies are not harmful, and in contrast, it is a live one who can be dangerous..."

I was too young to answer his question at that time; or, better to say, I could not find any good reason for this behavior.

Now, at this age, I've got something as a reply to the question. Not sure if it is the right one but seems to be. Here it is:

The fact is that, when we see a dead body, we see our future in a moment. We find that we will have the same destiny after all. Sooner or later. And then, there is a feeling of fear. What about seeing people sleeping or unconscious? Why it does not impose the same feeling? Maybe because of the hope. We know that s/he will get into the real world soon; But a dead one, no...

Science and engineering

Sometimes I think to myself about science & engineering. You know, the world is created as a whole thing; And then we started to explore. To know more and more and in some cases, to copy the natural processes/objects and produce some new facilities or ...
Long long ago, there were people who were called scientists because of their important role in explorations. Many of them dealing with so many subjects such as medicine, astronomy, mathematics,...
Today, the world has been changed to a great extent. However, it has been all about us. I mean we changed it to ease our life. And there is no doubt that a huge work has been done to reach this point. However, taking a look around myself, I can see the main problems still remaining. Yet, there are lots of diseases untreated or problems like blindness have not been resolved despite a huge advancement in both science and engineering.

Here is what Bill Wulf says:
"There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend the whole."

And it makes me think again: Where are we?

The Sky

I was thinking to a new subject for today. But after reading your nice comments on previous post, I changed my mind and decided to say some words regarding to the previous post and your findings...

First of all, it seems that almost all of you are not looking at the sky quite often. How come?
Secondly- and as a reply to "me"- I should say that lots of things happen during a night and you miss them all if you simply ignore it. To many of us, life seems to get sophisticated day by day. But it is not the fact. See the stars? Still calm and bright. Bringing you nice moments of being yourself. So do not let the work take the whole thing. Better to leave for ourselves at least for a few moments.

And to those who saw a cloudy sky, you should try to see far beyond.

Those who missed the night and the beautiful sky, are missing it everyday. How often do you take a deep breath and watch the stars in a silence?

Aliens? No. Maybe we are the aliens or a reflection of someother people. It just reminded me the short poem of Shel Silverstein again:

##########
Each time I see the Upside-Down Man
Standing in the water,
I look at him and start to laugh,
Although I souldn't oughtter.
For maybe in another world
Another time
Another town,
Maybe he is right side up
And I am upside down
##########

And to all of you, as the last point of the post: The sky could be your heart...

Tonight

Tonight, take a look at the sky and you'll see...

Happy nation

For this weekend and as a reply to those friends who keep asking about my trip, I selected "Happy nation" from Ace of Base. The song really shows what I'm looking for and where I'm going to go.

And you got to believe it. Yes believe me. I'm not looking for a perfect man but I do look for a situation leading to sweet salvation; For a place where the people know that the time goes by and flies fast. And so the people do. But the ideas will remain. Yes. That's the point. And it brings you happiness. Then you can really dance...

##########
Laudate omnes gentes laudate
Magnificat en secula
Et anima mea laudate
Magnificat en secuala

Happy nation living in a happy nation
Where people understand
And dream of the perfect man
A situation leading to sweet salvation
For the people for the good
For mankind brotherhood

We’re traveling in time

Ideas by man and only that will last
And over time we’ve turned to the past
That no man’s fit to rule the world alone
A man will die but not his ideas

Happy nation...

We’re traveling in time
Traveling in time

Tell them we’ve gone too far
Tell them we’ve gone too far
Happy nation come through
And I will dance with you
Happy nation

Happy nation...
##########

Destination?

Friends are asking about my trip and they are probably willing to know my plan.
Well, the problem is that I'm not sure. I mean I have booked my flight to Iran but for how long?

Anybody knows my destiny or destination? Tell me please for the sake of my soul...

By the way, please wait for two more posts for today...

A bright week

Well, this is my weekly report brought to you (perhaps to satisfy your curiousity!!!).
Monday was a short day coz I had to leave early. Collecting the documents and some luggages took the whole day. Tuesday was a stormy one, you know. I had many things to do; so I got to ride on my bicycle in the storm. And rest of the week was the same as the begining. Packing my stuff for the trip, having some discussion with my professor about my future plan,...

And why bright? It is all about yesterday when I heard that Meysam has succeeded in entrance examination for PHD degree in Tohuku University... OMEDETO GOZAIMASU Meysam san...

Forgotten

There are many things which are forgotten these days.
In fact, if you ask me, I call them some forgotten morals of life. We used to live a simple life, to make friends regardless of their social situation, to respect people (our parents, teachers,...), and ...

When we grow up, we change our view though the things remain unchanged. In fact we are forced to accept some ideas, we learn to look more carefully and perhaps more negatively. So that we do not trust people that easy, we do judge people considering their social/economical situation,...

Well. To finish this post, I bring a prayer ( you know almost everybody forgets about praying before sleeping) of the selfish child (from Shel Silverstein):

##########
Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Lord my soal to keep,
And if I die before I wake,
I pray the Lord my toys to break.
So none of the other kids can use'em...
Amen.
##########

Black & White

It was a black & white day here (in our campus) yesterday.

Why black and white? Well it is all about the entrance examination for MSc course. You know, Japanese dress formally in so many occasions and such examinations are among them.

And if you are experienced with Japan's life, you may know that almost all of them wear black coats and white shirts and of course dark-(blue,...) neck ties for such official occasions.

And if you are new here, they all look the same, you know.

Nice scene...

Izogashi

Iranians, no doubt, are among those talented nations with great potentials. However, many of those Iranians who get the chances, use their talent in a wrong way (or maybe we can not call it a talent or something). I mean, they learn the negative points instead of positives.

Let me give you an example. Japanese are known for their hard work and responsibility, punctuality, and many other morals. In fact they are (or better to say: were) hardworking people as the young generation is deviating from this line compared to the previous generations who built Japan.

Young japanese pretend to be busy whenever you call them. They show themselves busy even if they are wasting their time reading manga or simply doing nothing.

And Iranians? Yes. They do the same here in Japan. It happened many times here when I contacted some friends asking for their response. In a deal with Japanese, they are very punctual and obey all the rules and reply on-time, just because of their fragile situation here. But when it comes to the Iranian friends, they put no time for response...
Last week, I sent an email to all of our friends in Kyushu island asking for their preferred schedule for a camping program. And I, clearly, asked for the answer by the end of the week whether positive or negative. Many of them did not reply as usual and when I wrote them about their bad habit, I got these answers:

First one: Well, I tried to reply via hotmail but failed. And the fact was that he was sending his email via gmail this time. So he said: Send me emails via hotmail and I'll reply via gmail???

Second one: I was busy with packing my luggage in the university. So I had no time to reply. Here, the fact is that this guy has a 24h access to internet both at home and university. Another lie.

So they are IZOGASHI (busy) and will not care about you coz you are an Iranian? Yeah. I've seen them being puncutual with foreigners.

This has happened several times; to tell the truth, in every case. And the thing is that they are looking for someone to arrange everything and then they say OK we'll join.

Why Iranians expect the others to serve them and then enjoy the result? Why almost nobody is willing to do something him/herself? Why nobaody is taking the responsibilities? And why they do not change themselves especially after being in Japan (among these very high responsible people) for several years?

So how do you treat these guys?

Here I am

Well. Typhoon is over and I got my day off yesterday.
Not really off coz I had to do some works in ward office, Bank, convenience store,... So I was rushing to many places under the heavy rain riding my bicycle. And was pushed by the wind several times.
You can imagine the scene after getting back home...

Anyway, we survived thanks to the Japanese and their construction skills. And, by the way, thanks to all of you for your kind comments.

All in all, it was a good day spending time on collecting some luggage, watching TV (I like samurai movies, you know), taking a nap,...

And last night, I had a dream which gave me a nice idea. I'll try to bring it to the real world after stabilizing my situation somewhere on this planet. Not now...

Please stay tuned for today's post. It will hopefully come in about an hour.

Ashita wa taifoo desu

A hurricane is crossing Kyushu island.

At the moment, it is sweeping Miyazaki province and will reach here tonight and will stay until Tuesday afternoon according to the weather forcasts. It is in the level of Katrina covering an area of about 1500 km in diameter and raising the waves up to 9m high. We were told that all means of transport will stop tomorrow and it will be impossible to get here. So, there will be no post for tomorrow. But I promise to come back on Wednesday. You know, we had 11 storms hitting the area last year, so...

And let's pray for the victims of Katrina before ending the post...

Hiroshima

We went to Hiroshima yesterday to visit the peace park and museum.

This was my first visit to the beautiful city of Hiroshima. And I've visited Nagasaki three or four times. There you can find many things including pictures of the city before and after the A-bombings, ruins of the buildings, clothing and many many items affected. There are also lots of pics of the people burned, radiated, gone with pushing a button. Letters of those politicians and scientists (including Albert Einstein) who endorsed the letter giving the right of application of the newly-developed bombs to the president.

And the feeling; You got to be there to feel it yourself. To see how a stupid decision makes a big change in just a few seconds. Everything was burned in a circle of 1.5 km radius. Things were completely destroyed in several kilometers and many more were affected in distant places.

And there were pics of a kid who suffered from radiation for 10 years and died. She spent her life to make birds out of paper as symbol of the peace. You got to see her, sleeping calm in her coffin...

Who is liar?

Sorry for the title. But the idea just jumped into my mind.
And what is it about?

Well. I'll start it with a question: If you got to sell something, how do you give information to the customers? Surely, you got to give info in the best way you can.

Several days ago, there was an email from someone announcing that s/he is willing to sell his desktop computer. And information? It is a 3 years old desktop with a flat screen with pictures attached. Pictures? Don't expect too much. Just the computer from different sides. Nothing more...

You know, sometimes people do not lie but they say their words so that you should miss-understand (and they want it to be so). No way. So is it some kind of lie? Seducing people? Or it is the duty of you to get what s/he does not mean?

Hello Goodbye

I'm spending my days with packing the stuff. You know, time flies fast. Faster than what you think. Faster than a blink. I remember the days I came here. Saying hello to the friends here, and looking to the future with a feeling which can not be expressed in words.

And now, I'm getting ready to say goodbye. Not to the friends but just to the beatiful city of Fukuoka and the Japanese culture. I admit that I can not leave some habits-I got here- coz they have found their place in my soul. And why not to say goodbye to the friends? Just because I hope to meet them again somewhere.

And sometimes it is difficult to understand some words. Even "hello" and "goodbye", may be because of our feelings. How do you feel when you hear those words, by the way?

OK. Song of the week is "Hello, Goodbye" by Beatles. Yes, Beatles with their fantastic and everlasting songs. Lyrics is written by Paul McCartney. The strory of how the song was created is somehow interesting. According to Songfacts.com, Paul McCartney wrote this. His friend Alistair Taylor, who was visiting McCartney, asked Paul one day how he wrote his many songs, and how he came up with his ideas. Paul took him into his dining room to give him a demonstration of his hand-carved harmonium. As an experiment, Paul asked Taylor to shout out the opposite of whatever he sang, such as black and white, yes and no, hello and goodbye, etc. From this, the song was born.

##########
You say yes, I say no
You say stop and I say go, go, go
Oh, no
You say goodbye and I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello

I say high, you say low
You say why, and I say I don't know
Oh, no
You say goodbye and I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye I say hello

Why, why, why, why, why, why
Do you say good bye
Goodbye, bye, bye, bye, bye

Oh, no
You say goodbye and I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye I say hello hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye I say hello
Hello

Hela, heba helloa
Hela, heba helloa
##########

And btw, I'm still here. Will let you know the plan...

Off-duty

There was almost nothing to do this week. It started with some sample preparation through sputtering, annealing,...

But it stopped because of the lack of facilities. Not due to the money shortage but because of the holidays. I was waiting for the gold crucible to come. You know, we use this crucible to melt chemicals. This is the only way we can make sure that the resulting mixture remains pure (un-affected by the melting pot). And still we are waiting. And the problem? Well, there was a small hole in it which resulted in waste of time...

Anyhow, I spent the whole week on preparation of my stuff for the trip and arranging the things such as house contract, ticket reservation. Where to? Iran of course (or better to say: Off course).
So please stay on the line as there will be two more posts coming today...